Mostly, I've just felt sleepy. No amount of coffee has been able to help me shake this, in spite of the fact that I do drink a lot of it -usually while I write this blog, in fact. I've very seldom used energy drinks -usually when they are given to me for free at car shows, or promotional events, but maybe that would help undermine the doldrums of fall.
It is somewhat appropriate then, that I should have come across today’s vehicles while out running errands (another thing I managed to accomplish in spite of myself) this past week. Both of today’s vehicle models have been used to promote a certain energy drink known as Red Bull.
First up, we have a truly odd little rig called the Suzuki X-90. These are silly little vehicles that aren't quite SUVs, but not quite sport coupes, either. They’re in a strange kind of limbo all their own, which is probably why they were only offered for sale in the US as 1996-1998 models.
Just what are we looking at here? Mechanically, it is a twin and replacement, actually, of the Suzuki Samurai -though the slightly larger Sidekick -also sold as the Geo Tracker is what really caught on with people who would have purchased the Samurai. I had a friend in high school named Chris who moved away, then moved back senior year who drove a teal colored Samurai -can’t say I was particularly impressed with it, but the idea of taking the cloth top off the back seemed like it might be fun if not for the fact that it was winter time when we took it out. For some reason, I‘m remembering only one instance of riding in the Samurai -when we took it to a coffee house that was operated out of the main floor of an old Victorian home in Des Moines called Chat Noir -that place is gone now, but they had fantastic crepes and coffee, and I used to love going there. I don’t know what ever happened to that guy…. Sorry about the tangent, but if you've read any of my other posts, you’ll know that I tend to side track myself quite often -maybe it‘s just too much coffee, or perhaps not enough -I don‘t know.
Anyway, the X-90 is basically a sleeker styled Suzuki Samurai without the cloth top on the rear and without a back seat-it’s been transformed into a notchback coupe. All X-90’s were two-seaters and had T-top roofs that could stow away in the trunk with relative ease. I remember seeing these things on dealer lots when they first hit the market and thinking how strange but oddly appealing they seemed. They were little 4x4 creatures that never quite settled on what they wanted to be when they grew up: an SUV or a coupe. Under the hood, they harbor a 1.6L I4 engine capable of 95 HP and 98 lb-ft of torque that came standard with a 5 speed manual transmission -nothing to brag about, but really, the car only weighs around 2,300 lbs, so it’s not like it really needs much more to transport its occupants from place to place.
These are not considered valuable, nor are they particularly treasured -but they do have some rarity backing the notion that someday, they could be. Given the short span of time they were on the market, it isn’t too surprising to know that there were only just over 7,000 sold in the US. Of course, there’s a reason for that short market presence, too. X-90’s are too impractical to do much aside from leisurely driving, they sit too high, and have too short a wheel base to maneuver like a sport coupe, but too low to do any real off-roading. For the $15,000 or so that they cost back when they were new in the mid to late 1990’s, buyers looking for a sporty ride would have been better suited buying a Mazda Miata, and those looking for a compact SUV could dedicate another couple thousand and have something like a Toyota RAV4 or a Suzuki Sidekick. So, you can see where would-be X-90 buyers may have been lost along the way to purchasing a new car. It’s not that people didn't like the X-90 -despite the fact that X-90s are not particularly powerful, though have enough go to propel the tiny little rig when it needs to move, these are charming little vehicles -they look ridiculous in an endearing way that makes you want to like them, just not well enough to own one..
That’s not to say that fun stuff can’t be done with an X-90. With a stock X-90, you can take the T-tops off and have a good time just cruising in the summer. For just about anything else, you’re going to have to do some modifications. Lift the suspension, upgrade the shocks, and fit the vehicle with some off road rubber, and you could have a neat little off-roader. Lower the suspension and find some ways to soup up the engine, add some performance tires, and you could have a street sleeper masquerading as a tiny little clown car in training. Those are viable options, I’d say. Considering you can buy an X-90 for around $1,500-$3,000 nowadays, that should leave some wiggle room in the wallet for upgrades.
Such a tragic little figure, the X-90 -admired but ultimately unloved, perpetually straddling automotive market lines though never quite finding its niche…. Except that it kind of did. The compact size, fuel-efficient engine, head-turning oddball looks, and notchback design of the X-90 translated perfectly into a promotional vehicle for Red Bull. Once the vehicle received a repaint or a wrap, some decals, a set of brackets mounted on the vehicle’s roof and trunk lid, then fitted with a giant fake can of Red Bull, the X-90 became a zoomy little mobile advertisement for the brand.
Speaking of which, here’s what replaced the X-90s that Red Bull was using for advertising once their fleet aged a bit too much. This is an actual Red Bull modified Mini that is now stripped of its wrap, but still bears the modded notchback rear end and giant Red Bull can brackets. I found it sitting in a used car lot a few months ago -and it’s still there now -apparently there aren't too many Mini shoppers wanting to be seen in a former Red Bull car.
How does it stack up against the X-90? Well, this one is a 2009 Mini Cooper, so we know it’s at least 11 years newer than the latest model year X-90 that’s out there in the world. Like the X-90, the little Mini features a 1.6L I4 engine, though it comes with a 6 speed manual rather than a 5 speed. The Mini produces 118 HP and 114 lb-ft of torque, though -which is certainly more than the X-90‘s 95 HP and 98 lb-ft of torque rating, but not a huge gain considering the Mini had 11 years to advance that the X-90 did not have. Curb weight on a 2009 2 door hatchback Mini is just under 2,600 lbs, so it’s a bit heavier than the X-90. I don’t know the curb weight of a mini that’s had its hatchback chopped in favor of a notchback design, though I’d imagine that it managed to lose at least a hundred pounds or so in the process -even when it was outfitted with the giant fake Red Bull can. Of course, there’s no 4x4 for the Mini unless you move to a different model, so the X-90 has that one in the bag.
This particular Mini carries an asking price of just under $9,000 and has 131,000 miles on its odometer. I think they’re asking too much. If, however, this Mini was the “S” spec, which comes with a turbo, weighs in at roughly 100 lbs more than the base Mini, and blasts out 172 HP and 177 lb ft of torque, then I bet this Mini would have no problem finding a buyer who would gut it out further to drop weight and turn it into a little track rocket. A leap up from that to the John Cooper Works variant bumps those specs up to 208 HP and 192 lb-ft of torque for the 2009 model year -though, as unlikely as Red Bull was to spend the extra money on an S model, it’s even less likely they would spring for the JCW variant just to mount a can of Red Bull on the back and drive around town - even if the sprightly dash of added power would have been entirely appropriate in the context of the product that the vehicle is advertising.
As is sometimes the case with my blog, our featured vehicles are going to take a turn down the lane of crime and justice. In this case, the tie in comes courtesy of the Red Bull association both these cars share. Sadly, the heir to the Red Bull fortune managed to hit and kill a motorcycle cop in Bangkok in 2012 -an accident from which he fled, actually dragging the victim along with for some time, then later neglected to show up in court to face charges for. The Red Bull heir was driving a gray Ferrari FF at the time of the accident, but when I first read the story some time ago, my mind pictured him fleeing the scene in a Red Bull X-90 fitted with a giant silver and blue Red Bull energy drink can on its back end. I suppose either car is going to stand out like a sore thumb no matter where it goes, so I’m not sure why the guy thought he could get away with the hit and run in any event…. Well, actually, I do, he IS heir to a multi-billion dollar fortune, and money does tend to function as immunity from responsibility for one’s own actions to a certain extent. Indeed, just this past September, the heir skipped his 6th court date pertaining to the hit and run, which meant that the statute of limitations for the speeding charge of the indictment expired (doesn’t seem quite fair, does it?). He could face 10 years in prison (which also seems inadequate in view of his actions), though if he keeps managing not to show up to take his lumps, it seems unlikely he’ll ever have to take responsibility.
Well, today’s cars both took their lumps; one as the little misfit of the automotive world of the late 1990’s (if there was an island of misfit cars, it would be populated with X-90’s for sure), and the other as a rolling advertisement, now stripped of its vestments and left to await its fate in a used car lot. That billionaire in his now mangled Ferrari has nothing on the X-90 and this Mini.
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